5 things you can learn from “Vicky Donor”

Those who didn’t know Sperm Donation was a business suddenly woke up after seeing this movie and realized how much money they have flushed down the drain (literally). We all read and shared that on facebook. But if you are an observant and curious 'sperm', there are more things in store for you. The Five things that I learned from this sensible laugh-riot are –

1)    Persistence is the key – Don’t take 'NO' for an answer
Yes, that’s the greatest sales lesson this movie teaches. We all know it and there’s nothing sensational about it but ask yourself, how many of us follow it as passionately and shamelessly as Doctor Chaddha and Vicky did?
Vicky said ‘NO’ to donate his sperms – not once, not twice, not thrice – but so many times that I have even lost the count. But Dr Chaddha (superbly played by Annu Kapoor) didn’t take any of the NOs to his heart and finally won Vicky’s sperm!
The same indefatigable spirit was exhibited by Vicky while picking up Ashima. Honestly guys, how many of you would have stood against the never-ending cold-shoulders given by the girl? But he simply went on with his stuff, finally thawing the ice of disregard with the warmth of his smile and cockiness (assisted by Ashima's friends).

2)    Why so serious?? – Loosen up a bit
First things first - guys simply love the chase. But when the entire movie turns out to be a chase sequence, it’s a turn off. There’s no point in being too uptight and too serious all the time. Be a sport, have some fun.
Lets face it, Vicky had to romance that girl (after all, he was paid to do that) and hence he tolerated all that frigidity, but girls, to expect that from every guy would be a folly.
Now, I am not saying that you simply turn off your 'firewall' and welcome every Tom, Dick and Hariharan; that will be dangerous. But don’t keep it too high that even genuine websites don’t open up! Give a chance to the guy and to yourself.

3)    Chuck e-banking, go to your bank damn it!
Nightclubs and bars are passé. Banks are the new Pick-up hot spot. With so many beautiful girls doing MBA in finance, the ‘Glamour Capital’ of banks has witnessed a steep rise. So stop losing your money and sperm count in a bar, go to your bank and get lucky!
There are great opportunity losses associated with e-banking or calling the customer care of your service provider all the time.
And lastly,  if your bank is 'Air India', Fly Emirates (can't say Kingfisher any longer cuz that's bankrupt!)

4)    Porn is cool – 3 cheers to Sunny Leone!
In the 'climax' of movie the doctor says– “the reason of the happiness of these couples (who were earlier childless) is Vicky Donor”. But trace it a little backwards and you will realize that the foundation of this happiness was laid down with PORN! No porn, no sperm, no pregnancy, no baby, no happiness. Are you able see where I am coming from?
So stop treating porn as a poor cousin of mainstream movies and give it equal if not more respect. We certainly don’t want to lose more talents like Sunny Leone to Bollywood, do we? This ‘groin-drain’ needs to be checked before it robs us of our happiness!

5)    Marriages can’t last long on a lie, LIVE-IN can!
First of all, why the hell did they marry? I can’t believe that a film based on such a sensitive and modern topic can be so regressive. Plus marriages aren’t so simple that the groom says he is into trading (with zero investment, super-high returns) and everyone simply takes his word. There is a whole lot of CID inquire that goes into. Plus, you have to disclose everything else face the music later.
However, a Live-in doesn’t invite all that scrutiny. People are together as long as they like each other’s company. You need not to be an open book if you don’t wish to and relationship doesn’t normally falls apart if some ‘insignificant’ secret surfaces later.

Anna's Volunteers fight a new battle: MCD Elections

The Anti corruption crusade of Anna Hazare may not have been successful yet in getting Jan Lokpal Bill passed in the Parliament but it has certainly inspired three of its volunteers to enter the system in an attempt to clean it.

Meet Ankit Kakkar (29), Bharti Fotedar and Pradeep Bansal (41) who have decided to fight the MCD elections 2012 scheduled for April 15 as independent candidates with the symbol “Window”. Their wards are – Bijwasan(141), Palam(145) and Matiala(136) respectively.

All these three people had been core volunteers in the Anna’s movement and instrumental in garnering support from Dwarka and West Delhi.

They openly acknowledge the influence of Anna Hazare, Baba Ramdev and Sri sri Ravishankar on their decision. In fact they use it as their USP - wearing the “I am Anna” cap while campaigning.

They have also gone online in their campaigning and have created a facebook page - “Candidates for transparency”, which has so far 86 likes.

Their main agenda is to bring transparency and accountability in the way government functions with their impressive looking and idealistic manifesto.

Ankit Kakkar, a resident of Sec 9 Dwarka, works as a Senior Lead Engineer with globalLogic. Pradeep Bansal lives in Sec 6 and works at Metro Mines and Minerals Company while Bharti, a sec 7 resident and Engineer by education, is an entrepreneur.

to further know about them, follow the links - 

1) Pradeep Bansal (Matiala ward) https://www.facebook.com/mms.pradeep
2) Ankit Kakkar (Bijwasan ward) https://www.facebook.com/kakkar.ankit
3) Bharti Fotedar (Palam ward) https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100003672433364 

The king of all Dosas - CTR's Banne Masala Dosa

Masterpiece in the making. Mahesh is the name of the chef.

If there is one dish which represents South India, it has to be Dosa. However, making Dosa is just like Photography, any monkey can click a photograph but it’s a different ball game altogether to come up with a master-piece, consistently.

Central Tiffin Rooms (CTR) on Margosa Road at Malleshwaram, Bangalore is one such place which has mastered the art of making Dosas to the hilt. Although, by the looks, it appears like an ordinary eating joint; No flashy signboards, no excessive décor. Probably this surprise element adds to the ultimate taste of its Dosas.

Pure taste, no jing-bang. Clear hai !
Notice the dark brown crispy crust.

The service is prompt and the ambience is pleasing. Within 5 minutes of ordering, my Banne Masala Dosa was in front of my eyes. 'Banne' in Kannad means butter. It wasn’t an ordinary dosa after-all.

Not only it tastes different, it looks different too. Unlike other lanky dosas that u get elsewhere, this one was crisp and dark. Thanks to the butter, the outer dark crust was glistening, almost giving the feel of a glass. It’s served with two types of coconut chutnys, one of them a bit spicy. But honestly they are redundant, the dosa itself is so delicious and filling.

Too engrossed in the taste to attend to the camera!

 Without any doubt, Banne Masala Dosa is CTR’s superstar but that doesn’t mean 'CTRwood' doesn’t have any other talented ‘actors’. Mangalore Bajji, which looks like meatballs, gives you a very unique yet relishing flavor of Bangalore. The Vada they serve also also a must have.

If you are a foodie CTR is one place which will satiate all your taste buds (at least vegetarian taste-buds). It's highly likely that your search of the perfect dosa might end here. Even if it doesn't, your bar will certainly be raised.

 

When M.Tech students teach B.Tech, Everyday is 'Teacher's Day'

While the Nation celebrates Teacher’s day on 5th September, Government College of Engineering, Amravati (GCEA), celebrates it every day!

Here, students of M.Tech (Master of Technology) take classes - both theory and practical - of B.Tech students. "Sometimes 4 out of 5 theory subjects in a semester are taught by these M.Tech students, while all the practicals are conducted by them," told a 2nd year student on the condition of Anonymity. "We only have one 'Regular faculty' - our HoD (Head of the Department) - who hardly teaches," he added. "A girl who just passed out (from B.Tech) last year is now teaching us!" tells a second year student, with a smirk.

Every M.Tech student who has qualified GATE (Graduate Aptitude Test in Engineering) has to do 'Teaching Assistantship' (TA). They devote 8 hours per week in classroom teaching and/or laboratory assignments for which they get a stipend of Rs. 8,000/month. However, In the name of 'Classroom teaching' they are being forced to teach theory subjects for an entire semester at the cost of B.tech students' career.

'Classroom Teaching' is meant to provide some teaching experience to the students," said Dr Rita Goyal, Senior Consultant at National Project Implementation unit (NPIU). NPIU implements Technician Education Projects of the government assisted by World Bank. TEQIP is one such project which talks about this Assistantship. She said that neither an individual nor many such M.Tech students collectively, be forced to teach theory subjects to B.Tech students. The college must have faculty with appropriate qualifications.

Not all M.tech students at GCEA take theory subjects but there are no criteria behind making this choice. "It's based on our discretion" was the reply of Mr Chatur, HoD of Computer Science and Engineering (CSE).

Department of Technical Education (DTE) under which the institute comes, clearly mentions on its website that one has to be at least M.E/M. Tech with a 1st class in either Bachelors or Masters degree to be an Assistant Professor on contract. But Mr. Chature confessed that they had teachers on contract in the past who were just B.tech!

While these 'Student-Teachers' can't say anything, B. Tech students have chosen not to. "We have learnt not to ask questions because their own concepts aren't clear, which they themselves confess," shrugged a B.Tech student. But the glum mood in the hostel room was lightened up when his friend recounted - "often they forget what they had mugged up and then they stare at the walls."

Also, the college enjoys academic autonomy, which means papers are set and evaluated within the college. Hence the students prefer remaining quiet and keeping teachers happy rather than jeopardising their results by raising this issue.

But the ground reality is - the college is suffering from acute shortage of teachers. The CSE department has only 7 teachers while the requirement is of 15. Only the HoD is a regular faculty while rest are on contract. Rs 24,000 is what a contract-faculty gets. Moreover, the recruitments are done by Maharashtra Public Service commission (MPSC). "The college has noting in its own hand," whines Prof. D. J. Chaudahri, Principal of GCE.

However, there is certainly one thing in college's hand - the future of 240 odd B. Tech students - with which it's playing.

(this college is just the tip of the iceberg, the rot is far deeper and widespread throughout India)

Anna's Warriors

There’s no denying the fact that it’s the inspirational leadership of Anna Hazare and tactical insight of his team that coerced the parliament to agree to the three contentious issues of Jan Lokpal bill ‘in principle’. However, we can’t credit less the contribution of millions of ‘foot soldiers’ across the country who took to the streets in support of this 74 year old Gandhian and wrote history in the process.
At Ramlila grounds, I interviewed a lot of people and every story had its own flavour but some stories simply stood out.

The beauty of this movement was that to be Anna’s warrior, strength of your soul took precedence over strength of your body which was clearly demonstrated by Mr Manoj Dawar, an entrepreneur who owns a Gym and a Salon in Delhi. He has spent half of his life on a wheel chair, thanks to a Spinal Cord injury in an accident 22 years back but that didn’t stop him from coming to Ramlila Grounds and articulating his opinion. “Why is the govt. shying away from an open debate? Let intellectuals and experts discuss on the bill and if Jan Lokpal provides the solution to the rampant corruption, why not?” he suggested.

Meet Chaand Singh, Driver with a company that works under contract with MCD. His job was to pick the huge dustbins overflowing with litter installed throughout the ground in his truck and replace them with fresh ones. I asked him how different he finds his work at Ramlila Grounds compared to other days. He responded, “yeh to Janseva hai” (this is public service). When I inquired if it’s not “janseva” other days, he quipped, “aur din to hum pi ke pade rahte hain” (on other days, we just Drink and while away our time)! That was one of the most honest acknowledgements I had ever heard. He further added that “generally, we call it a day after 6-7 rounds but today, we are working since morning, must have picked 15-20 dustbins and it’s still going on”. It was 3PM already!

Chaand Singh’s helper, Raju, told me that he and his colleagues live in a house provided by the company, if that can be called a “house”. It has no bedding, no electricity, no drinking water and no washroom facility! “It’s like pigs living in a shed”, Chaand Singh intervened with an analogy. “We have to buy pouches of water to drink. We hardly save anything and to add insult to injury, company doesn’t pay us our legitimate wages and we don't get any receipt of our Provident Fund deductions”. I felt that if anyone needs Janlokpal badly, it’s these guys.

Now let’s meet Mrs Tarika Ekka, mother of two from Chattisgarh who took a week off from her work and family responsibilities to support Anna. Her family was under the impression that she was heading to Jabalpur till she reached New Delhi along with her brother and informed them. “They wouldn’t have let me come otherwise” she clarified. A victim of corruption herself in Police dept., Administration and judiciary, she had jotted down her thoughts in a letter addressed to Anna Hazare.

Anna didn’t only wake up the Indians but he captured the imagination of people around the world. One such couple was Stef Van Hulst and Pebby Werring from Holland who were holidaying in Nepal when they saw the news about Anna’s protest. Without further ado, they flew down to Ramlila grounds to show their support to Anna and witness this historic moment. In their peculiar accent they said, “This movement is very important for the history of India”. They left the ground in the evening while waving to Anna to fly back to Kathmandu.

Sachin Gupta(third from left) with his’water’ team at Ramlila grounds.

Photo courtesy: Kapil Syal

If there was one thing that was most sought after at Ramlila grounds, after Anna Hazare, it was water. And to provide it to hundreds of thousands of people coming there every hour was a daunting task in itself. Sachin Gupta, a businessman, took up that challenge and executed it with finesse. He and his team of volunteers built everything from scratch including a warehouse and distribution counters. “Getting clearances from the police to let the supply vans enter every time is very frustrating” he said. Sachin, who has also worked in US as a software engineer, said,“ I have met a lot of influential people like Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, Hillary Clinton etc. but if there’s one person to whom I can give my Soul, that’s Anna”.

While Anna was fasting, his supporters certainly needed to keep their energy levels high. Mr Tikayam Chauhan and many others like him were ensuring this with their Free Food Stalls which they very appropriately named as “Anna Ki Rasoi” (Anna’s Kitchen). The food was simple yet delicious and their service with a smile made it tastier. When Asked till what time they serve the food, “as long as the people come”, was his response. But the high point of the conversation came when I asked who was sponsoring the food; he unequivocally said – “ANNA” – and refused to mention the name of his trust/NGO. That was a sweet surprise in this publicity hungry world. May be it was “Anna Effect”.

(from left) Kanishka cheers while Simran and Iqra offers Anna Coconut water & Honey.

Image Courtesy- AP photo/Rajesh Kumar Singh

Among all these grown ups, there was this little soldier of Anna who was second to none in her enthusiasm. What set her apart was her charismatic smile and indefatigable spirit. Seven year old kanishka is a class two student and was consistently present at the grounds along with her mother. She would wave the Tricolor for hours at a stretch while donning the “I am Anna” cap. Even Anna Hazare couldn’t resist himself from waving to her. She was one of the three little girls present on the stage who helped Anna to break his 13 day marathon fast on 28th August.

Janlokpal Zamin Par !

We realized what ‘working on the ground’ really means when we went to the Villages of Faridabad district to create awareness about Jan Lokpal bill and rope in their support for Anna ji when he rekindle the ‘Satyagrah’ on 16th August.  

It was the idea of Rajiv sir and Shriom and I was a late entrant (infact, a replacement! ). It was an impromptu trip, i.e., we didn’t have any idea of the villages we would be visiting; we just went with the flow. We used to ask on a divergence – “bhaisaab, is road pe kaun kaun se gaon padte hain”?

We covered a lot of villages which, in the first look didn’t look like villages at all. Some of the houses were palatial bunglows, giving tough competition to thier Sainik Farms counterparts. They might lose out only because of the abysmal condition of roads (if they existed at all) !

Wherever we could find a village, we used to stop our car and go door to door giving Jan Lokpal Bill pamphlets typed in hindi. from a central point we used to diverge out in different direction and meet up again after covering that road to the maximum possible extent. I used to open up with "ummed karta hoon ki aapne Anna Hazare ji ke baare main suna hoga". I wasn't wrong either; more than 97% of the people gave an affirmation! Morning hours were quite good for this aproach as people were availabe at home and open to intrusion!

In afternoon hours, the probability of finding homes with open doors and people moving around only kept on reducing. Therefore we switched on to a different approach. After distributing pamphlets to people available in the small marketplace of a particular village, we would head towards the Sarpanch's house. There are 50-50 chances that you will be able to meet the Sarpanch.

Rajiv ji's experience came handy while persuading the Sarpanch to help us convey the message of Janlokpal bill to his/her villagers. there were primarily three ways in which he/she can do it -

a) distrbute the pamphlets among his people.

b) show the CD explaining Lan Lokpal bill in the next panchayat meeting.

c) sit along with his people on a satyagrah in his village to show solidarity with Anna ji on 16th August.

Now, obviously this approach has it's own merits and demerits.

It's very fast and focussed and if we succeed to get the support of sarpanch, an entire village can be mobilised at a short notice. However, it's easier said than done. Most of the sarpanches are politically aligned and its difficult for them to go against the party line irrespective of their personal openion. Also, the Palatial houses of most of the sarpanches were a clear indication of their seriousness for a strong anticorruption law like Jan Lokpal bill.

But, being optimists, we considered this apprach to be worth a shot.

Some of the names of the villages where we met/telephoned the sarpanchs are Chandawali, Mujhedi, Dayalpur, Attali, Muchhar, Budhena, Mothuka & Nangal. 

 It was a fantastic experience where we directly interacted with the people for whom this bill is meant. The people also fealt good about the fact that someone has come to get their involvement. 

I believe that this process can be improvised and replicated in other villages around Delhi or for that matter any group of Villages. Lets make small groups of volunteers who love meeting people and have no issues going to the outskirts of their cities. So if you got a Car or bike, just pick up some pamphlets and get going. If not, get hold of someone who has a car or bike! Lets educate the villagers about Jan Lokpal Bill and get thier support for Anna on 16th August. Because success is at the bottom of the pyramid !

The BABA BLACKOUT

There comes a moment in every man's life, however big strategists he may be, when LOGIC is taken over by PANIC. And Baba Ramdev is not an exception to this rule. Lets see how the Baba Blackout unfolded.

It was all going great. Baba had announced a pan-India "Bhrastachar mitao satyagrah" ( Corruption Eradication Movement) on 4 June and the government was tottering under that threat. Even the president of USA never received the kind of red carpet welcome that Baba got at the Delhi Airport. 4 Cabinet ministers came down kneeling to dissuade him from going ahead with the Satyagrah. Government budged to almost all his demands even before the fast began. Such was the bonhomie that the govt and Baba mutually signed a document declaring that we have come to a common ground on most demands and govt will act on them within 2 days and what will begin on 4 June will be a 'tap' (meditation) and not an Anshan (Protest).

Unfortunately, Baba never made this understanding with the government public. It was only during Kapil Sibbal's press conference that people came to know that such a thing has already taken place and aspersions of the fast being "fixed" started surfacing.

If Baba Ramdev had made that news Public before Kapil Sibbal, the credibility of Baba and his entire Anti-corruption campaign would have only increased. But he preferred to conceal the deal in order to keep the crowd engaged! He could have said - "although govt has agreed to most of our demands but we better sit here and see if they actually deliver on that considering their abysmal track record". I doubt anyone would have left after this honest address.

Now lets fast forward to 5th June, 1:30 AM when the brutal crackdown of the satyagrah happened at Ramlila Grounds. Delhi Police, whose slogan is - For you, with you, Always! (although they never clarified who the "you" is!),  stormed into the Pandal and mercilessly beat the people, including women, elderly and children, posing no threat whatsoever to anybody. It's a clear case of breach of 'Right to peaceful protest' given to us by the Constitution.

But what doesn't go down my gullet is - why did Baba run? and that too in woman's clothes. He shouldn't have. He should have stayed there like the Captain of the sinking Titanic irrespective of the consequences. And honestly speaking, the police wasn't there to kill him, they simply couldn't have done that; that's too big a risk to take by the state. At max, they could have arrested him and that would have only given a renewed vigour to his movement. A "Jail-bharo Aandolan" (Jail filling movement) could have spurred on his call and it's even beyond my imagination what form this movement would have taken then. BUTT...... and this one's bigger than J'Lo....here comes the ultimate BLACKOUT and instead of doing what everyone (including himself) expected from Ramdev, all he could do was flee only to be caught again.

One woman has lost her life in the process, several got seriously injured, while Baba is fighting against personal attacks and deteriorating health. The larger issue of corruption has been lost somewhere. However for BJP, this blackout has come with a silver lining, for it revived her political existence out of the blue! In one snap, the entire fight against corruption, hitherto a people's movement, has turned into a Political Mudslinging Festival.